Hugh Hollowell

This is sort of out of character for me. I generally don’t share much about my personal life on these pages, but, while there is no danger of my turning into John, I do have to say I had an awesome Valentine’s Day weekend.

Renee and I had dinner out on Friday, then I made supper at home on Saturday, we swapped gifts (I got this awesome handmade 10 page card/book and tons of Dark Chocolate) and then we went out for ice cream! (I got cookies and cream, she got chocolate fudge).

It was a very good weekend indeed. How was yours?

(Renee tells her side of the story with considerable more detail and pictures on her blog)

Last night, I had three friends over. As events go, it was probably underwhelming. We drank jug wine, ate dollar store wheat crackers and cheddar cheese that was on sale when I snagged it from Food Lion. But I have to tell you, it was the most fun I have had in ages. We all laughed and told funny stories about growing up and sad stories about loved ones dying. The topics of discussion ranged from bowel movements (you would have had to been there) to cremation to friends who were not there to cats and dogs and insane relatives.

It is times like this I find it hard to believe I have only been here about 18 months. In a way that nowhere else ever has, Raleigh feels like home. For a while, I thought of my friends here as my ‘Raleigh’ friends. Now, however, they are just my friends.

As I went to sleep last night, aglow in the warmth of the red wine and still smiling from the memory of all the laughter, I felt very loved.

Note: Some friends are putting this on… I will probably be there.

A Vigil for Raleigh’s 2008 Homicide Victims

Friday Thursday, February 5th, 5:00 pm
In front of City Hall, 222 W. Hargett St.
(the corner of Hargett St. and Dawson St.)

In 2008, Raleigh lost 32 members of our community to homicide. Many of the victims were young people in their teens and twenties.

Too often there is an overwhelming silence from the community after loss of life due to violence. Families of victims and all of us as members of this community deserve better. Violent death deserves reflection and response, not complacency. To ignore the violence is to implicitly accept it. We invite all residents of Raleigh to join us in changing our community norm from a passive acceptance of violence to an active rejection of it on moral, ethical and spiritual grounds. Come help us support the families of victims by saying, “We remember. We are here for you. We will not accept a continuation of the violence that took your loved one.”

Join us in saying: ‘No’ to Violence! and ‘Yes’ to Life! Join us in remembering the victims, supporting their families and praying for healing for all of us.

Came across this list on several blogs…

• We often can’t even read our OWN minds, so how can we possibly read yours?
• Learn to work the toilet seat. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down.
  You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
• Sunday sports: It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
• Crying is blackmail.
• Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
  Subtle hints do not work!
  Strong hints do not work!
  Obvious hints do not work!
  Just say it!
• Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
• Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
• Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
• If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
• You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both.
  If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
• Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
• ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
• If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
• If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
• If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
• When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really.
• Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.
• You have enough clothes.
• You have too many shoes.
• I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping.

I just came across a bleakaccount of Gaza from the perspective of an Irish activist who is in Gaza, on the ground.

It is trite to say there are no easy answers. It is easy to say there has always been conflict. It is simple to get on the side of Israel-after all, they are a “democracy”, our allies and there is that whole “God’s Chosen People” thing that factors into so much of our foreign policy.

The truth is, this is pain, this is hurt and death, this is war. It is not good, or right, or fair. If you are a person of faith and feel your God is taking the side of Israel (or, in fact, anybody’s side) in this conflict, I never want to meet your God. Sorry.

By the way, something that really opened my eyes to understanding this situation a bit better was the documentary Jimmy Carter, Man from Plains. it was a chronicle of the former president’s recent tour for his book “Palestine: Peace Not Apartheid.” (Also very helpful, I read it after seeing the film).

This year was a pretty boring year for me, at least as far as travel goes. Below is a list of cities I slept in this year. This is the first year I have documented it online, but I think in previous years the list would have been longer.

Byhalia, MS
Asheville, NC (actually, a small rest area on the outskirts of Asheville, during a snowstorm)
Interstate 75 (in a Greyhound Bus)
Cincinatti, OH
Raleigh, NC

Like I said, I went a lot more places than this, but to make the list, I had to spend the night there.

(got the idea from Kottke)

At least, it looks like that is what we are saying.  The UN passed a resolution on “the right to food”. The vote passed 180 (everyone else) to 1 (that would be us).

The money quote is:

By a vote of 180 in favour to 1 against (United States) and no abstentions, the Committee also approved a resolution on the right to food, by which the Assembly would “consider it intolerable” that more than 6 million children still died every year from hunger-related illness before their fifth birthday, and that the number of undernourished people had grown to about 923 million worldwide, at the same time that the planet could produce enough food to feed 12 billion people, or twice the world’s present population.

The first time I saw this, I put it down to a simple typo. But I have seen it often now, and I have NO idea what this is about. Let me explain.

I was on a friend’s website, where she wrote something to the effect of “I am about to eat and apple.” [Sentence changed to keep you from Googling it. Nosy.]

AND apple? I think you mean an apple. You do, right? I mean, you went to college and everything. You graduated from a real school in a state that did not end in a vowel. How can you not know this?

I thought it was a typo the first time I saw it on this friends site. But since then, I see it everywhere. If you want to cry, look at the results on this Google search.  Hell, this site maintained by the great free state of North Carolina encourages you to make an “Eat and Apple a Day” chart.

A whole generation does not know how to use the word “an”.  Can this be?

Shortly before I wrote this, I saw another post, by yet another educated person, who wrote that someone wanted “to borrow are snowblower”.  ARRRRGH! [Bangs head on desk].

The only thing I can think of is these people are writing the words the way they sound (said quickly, an sounds like and and our sounds like are). Maybe these people do not read and so have no idea that they are, in fact, different words?

I am sooooo going to grow old and be that guy that talks about kids these days.

Son,

One day, you will walk into a Dollar Tree (probably a Five Dollar Tree by then) and see a 10 pack of razors for a dollar.  You will be amazed at how inexpensive this is, and, because you are my son, you will have an overwhelming, near irresistible, urge to buy and use these razors.

Because I love you, it is imperative that you listen to me as I tell you, with all of the urgency I can summon, to resist this urge with all of your power.

Trust me on this.

Dad

In almost a year and a half of living in Raleigh, I have come to one conclusion; the food here sucks. And I am not just talking Bar-B-Que. I mean everything.

Now, admittedly, there is some hyperbole in the previous paragraph. For one thing, I have not tried every single restaurant in the city. And I have had some good meals in some restaurants. But by and large, when asked how a meal was in a given place, the answer has been “It’s ok…”. Not horrible, but certainly not ‘WOW”, or “This was incredible”, or “I have to tell my friends about this place”.

So, dear Raleigh residents, I appeal to you. Where is the good food in this place? Where is the noteworthy food? Where would an out-of-towner be a fool not to eat at?

Before you answer, my exacting criteria:

• I am looking for everyday places–not eat on your anniversary or birthday places. Besides, too many folks have recomended Olive Garden or Carrabas as places to go for those events… ewww!
• Which brings us to the next point–a good, memorable place to eat should not be a national chain. If I can have the same meal in the same surroundings in Toledo, it is not a memorable meal.
• I am not driving 25 miles to eat, so please do not recommend something in Durham or Chapel Hill. If I wanted to eat in Durham, I would have moved to Durham.
• It should not cost a whole paycheck to eat there. If my entree and drink cost more than a hardcover book, I simply will not eat there on a regular basis, no matter how good the food is.
• A great place does not EVER have a buffet. E-V-E-R.
• A great place should (duhh!) have good food.

I am begging you, dear readers, to recommend someplace I can eat in this town.  Specifically, I would LOVE to know where to find the following:

• A good Italian place. Preferably a family owned, non-chain Italian place. (Please do not recomend 2 Guys on Hillsborough–been there 3 times = suckage)
• A decent “home cooking” sort of place.
• A great bar (dark, quiet, no big screen TVs and whooping sports fans, long-term bartenders and no watery drinks)
• A diner (other than Waffle House). Preferably one that stays open 24hrs. Sometimes, you just want to be served bacon and eggs by a snaggle-toothed woman wearing a hairnet.
• Authentic (not tex-mex) Latino food.
• Sit down, (tablecloth, cloth napkins) Asian food.

Suggestions?

(Thanks to Prachi for the simile love…)