Hugh Hollowell

Once upon a time (and not all that long ago), I was a member of the religious right. I fought for the election of ‘Christian’ candidates, encouraged others to vote for Christian candidates, followed the (I am ashamed to say this…) voting guidance of James Dobson and his ilk and believed that the single most important issue on the table was overturning Roe v. Wade.

I try really hard not to get political on here, because I know what it is like to have an opinion and force it down everyone’s throat. I have been that guy, and do not want to be that guy ever again, even when I am fighting for the other side.

That being said, my politics began to change a few years ago when I began to follow Jesus (as opposed to merely being ‘Christian’… you know, say a prayer, believe Jesus = God, plan on heaven when I die). I began to want to imitate him, to try to be like him, to really follow him. And, it changed everything.

I have several friends who have reported similar happenings. However, it is never easy. To see a great example of the sort of struggles that such a decision can make in your life, you may want to read this great post by Will Samson, who was an anti-abortion activist, who believes his decision to follow Jesus has led him, for the first time, to vote against the anti-abortion candidate.

When you read it, do not focus on the specific candidate he is supporting. Rather, look at the reasoning he puts into it, the issues he addresses. I could have truthfully written 90% of that post.

In his post McDonalds Makes Jesus Cry, Huffington Post blogger Chris Kelly tells us how the AFA is now boycotting  McDonalds because they dared to donate $20,000 to the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce.  Apparently, the AFA sees this as just one step before selling small boys for sex in the happy meals.

The thing that saddened me the most is the comments from all the “Christians” on the AFA site. Here are a few choice comments from those who claim to follow in the way of Jesus.

“YOU DID NOT BILD YOUR COMPANY ON HOMOSEXUAL PEOPLE! IT WAS BUILD ON FAMILY VALUES! MAN,WIFE.CHILDREN!MOSTLTY CHILDREN! THEY DON’T COME FROM HOMO PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

or this one:

“The McFaddin Family will vote with our Money and Feet and take our business elsewhere! You can stuff your Happy Gay Meal and Happy Gay Agenda where the Sun don’t Shine!”

and my personal favorite from this follower of the Prince of Peace:

“The only thing you’ll be cooking is yourselves, for eternity.”

Sigh… being a follower of Jesus is hard. Somedays, though, it is harder dealing with other alleged Jesus Followers.

I love this quote from the movie Signs.

People break down into two groups when the experience something lucky. Group number one sees it as more than luck, more than coincidence. They see it as a sign, evidence, that there is someone up there, watching out for them. Group number two sees it as just pure luck. Just a happy turn of chance. I’m sure the people in Group number two are looking at those fourteen lights in a very suspicious way. For them, the situation isn’t fifty-fifty. Could be bad, could be good. But deep down, they feel that whatever happens, they’re on their own. And that fills them with fear. Yeah, there are those people. But there’s a whole lot of people in the Group number one. When they see those fourteen lights, they’re looking at a miracle. And deep down, they feel that whatever’s going to happen, there will be someone there to help them. And that fills them with hope. See what you have to ask yourself is what kind of person are you? Are you the kind that sees signs, sees miracles? Or do you believe that people just get lucky? Or, look at the question this way: Is it possible that there are no coincidences?

Which group do you fall in?

For those of you who are complaining you have not seen me in a while…

It was pure stream of consciousness, with no retakes (as you can see).

More on this later.

Lots of you know I work with the homeless.

Here is a great example of what I do, day to day. Not all days are this emotional; some are much worse.

Get the story here.

Bill the other night mentioned that he did not know much about St. Nicholas and said, jokingly, that if anyone did, it was Hugh…

I don’t know much, but I do know he has more in common with Ghandi and Martin Luther King and Jesus than he does the Comercial Santa we see every year. You see, Nicholas was a fighter for justice.

You can read about it on my blog about justice.

Christmas is my favorite holiday. (However, this does NOT mean I like Christmas music. I think there are only about 10 Christmas songs, and every radio station plays them over and over and over…)

As a kid, I am ashamed to say, more often then not it was all about the gifts. Even then, however, I felt especially happy in a candlelight service, the bells, the darkly lit church with the candle flames flickering, the story of the angels appearing to the shepherds, bringing them “…good tidings of great joy, which shall be for all people…”.

Even now, much more conscious of issues of scholarship and source material, I prefer to hear the Christmas story in the archaic, yet strongly poetic language of the King James Version.

Two different friends of mine are committing to blog daily throughout the advent season, with their thoughts and reflections on what they read that day. You may enjoy following along with them.

Bill (Merge Fearless Leader)

Chad (Fellow Mergian)

OK, my friend Bill asked a legitimate (if somewhat ambitious) question: Practically speaking, what can we do to help the poor and the oppressed in our communities?

This is a question I have given a lot of thought to. In fact, as a follower of Jesus, I think I have to give a lot of thought to this. It is one of those Moral Issues.

First, let me say I do not have all the answers, and any answers I would give you, dear reader, would be dismissed as unrealistic. I will say the reason there are no easy answers is often because we are not asking the right questions.

So, you ask me, what are the right questions? Don’t ask me; ask them. Or better yet, live their life and figure it out for yourself.

Take the bus EVERYWHERE for a month; it will change your perspective on poverty and its causes. No big deal, you say? How will you get the kids from school? Groceries are now limited to what you can carry by yourself. Plot out an hour of commute time. Better hope it does not rain… This is life for thousands in your city, everyday.

Leave your wallet and all your ID at home, then have someone drop you Downtown and leave you all day. No big deal, right? Where will you use the bathroom? Get water to drink? Blow your nose, for crying out loud? The folks at that friendly coffee shop are not so friendly when you are not buying anything. What is an inconvenience to you is a lifestyle for many, everyday.

That neighborhood that you do not feel safe driving through after dark? Try sleeping there for a night. I bet for $20 someone would be glad to put you up for the night. Now imagine sleeping there every night.

This is your life now: No car, dependent upon an arbitrary bus schedule, no place to piss and unwelcome anywhere you could, limiting your grocery shopping to what you can personally carry on the bus (and from the bus to your house), standing in the rain waiting to give someone you do not know a dollar to take you to work. Think you might have a better perspective on poverty now? Hey, quit your bitching; you still have your nice (not to mention adequate) clothes, your cable TV, your air conditioning, your well nourished children.

While you are doing this, you may find you come up with the questions.

Questions like: Why did the city of Raleigh made the entire population that uses the bus [that would be the working poor] walk three blocks out of their way so some rich guys could park their customized motorcycles in Moore Square Station a few weeks ago? Why not close the “covered parking” at Moore’s Square and let the buses run? I would tell you why, but if you had walked those three blocks, you would have no doubt why.

Do all that and then try not to get mad when some well meaning “Christian” tries to give you a meal but not until they have preached to you for half an hour about how you are probably going to hell anyway. Going? Hell, you have been living it.

To answer Bill’s question; Nothing. Nothing, that is, until we can understand their problems, until we can understand that to love our neighbor means wanting the same thing for that dark skinned single mother on the bus that we want for ourselves.

Before we can ever talk about answers, we need to make sure we really understand the questions. It is not hard to figure out what the questions are; you just have to be open to hearing them.

Something I wrestle with constantly.

Check out the video and let me know what you think.

An early mentor of mine told me that no one cares how I feel, only what I do. While it seems harsh, it is pretty much the truth. While it might be nice that I love my dog, what matters is that I feed my dog. It might be nice that I like my employees, but what matters is that I treat then fairly. It may be interesting that the soldier on the battlefield is scared, but what matters is if he overcomes the fear and acts. As Margaret Thatcher once said (paraphrased), “No one would remember the Good Samaratin if he had only had good intentions”.

I am both a Christian AND a follower of Jesus. He is important to me and in my life in a way that is difficult to explain to someone who does not know him, in much the same way that it is difficult to explain why you love your girlfriend to someone who does not know her.

Yet… sometimes I experience doubts. I have had months and months before where I prayed and prayed and felt nothing… no answers, no insights, no nothing. I have had times where I wondered if indeed some Romans may have hid his body after all. I have had times where I wondered if it were really all true, if God really was up there, listening to me. Sometimes, it felt like talking to myself.

The experience is not singular to me. Spiritual writers have called the feeling of doubt and/or abandonment a “Dark Night of the Soul”. While the most I have ever endured was a few months, it seems that Mother Theresa felt the same thing… for decades. It turns out shortly after she began her work, she felt Jesus withdrawing from her. He began not talking to her in her prayers, she could no longer get joy from his presence at communion. She felt forsaken.

Yet, she not only remained faithful, she thrived in His name. She began as a single 36 year old nun and ended up a world renowned figure, who pointed the world to Him, always told of her love for Him, did so many things in His name. She kept the faith.

The story illustrates many points I do not have the time to go into, but the one thing that struck me was her faithfulness. She continued to pray, even though she could not hear His answer. She kept doing great works in His name. She always managed to turn any accolades she received into a chance to tell of His love. It adds a new dimension to her often quoted maxim that we are never called to be successful, merely faithful.

If you were in love with someone and they refused to talk to you, how long could you carry that torch? Beyond that, could you, for decades, go out and tell the world, by your words and your deeds, about this great lover of yours? While atheists will make what they want out of this, to me, knowing this side of Mother Theresa’s spiritual life does nothing but enhance my admiration for her.